| icon | info | gamerscore |
|---|---|---|
| Pressed X a lot Earned cash by talking to people in the base. | 10 | |
| Shut Star Up Racked up 15 punches on Star while arguing. | 10 | |
| Neural Net Processors Destroyed 25 of Brad's BradBots. | 10 | |
| I Took Performance Enhancers Maxed out all of Captain Smiley's abilities. | 25 | |
| Hero of the Silver Age Completed all three issues of The Improbable Paper Pals. | 15 | |
| Collection of a True Fan Purchased every bonus from Dr. Winklemeyer. | 25 | |
| Two Stood Against Many Completed all three issues of Nanoc the Obliviator. | 15 | |
| Violence Solves Everything Fired 125,000 total shots (and counting...) | 10 | |
| He Ain't Even Married Survived Benny's onslaught during The Improbable Paper Pals #79 without taking a hit. | 20 | |
| Job Well Done, Faithful Reader Completed the game. | 25 | |
| Eugene's Protégé Finished each level with mistake-free reaction sequences | 20 | |
| Brad's Savior and Best Friend Completed all three issues of Cutie Cutie Kid Cupids. | 15 |
